A Chocolate Donut

January 8, 2008

The Name Game

Filed under: children, family, life, parenting — Wizus @ 1:10 pm

My daughter has decided she does not like her first name.  Maybe its a phase and she will get over it, but she is very determined to have everyone call her by her middle name.   Her dad is not happy but I don’t mind as much as he does.  You see, her middle name is what I wanted her first name to be.  I had it picked out years before but Hubby never vetoed it until the day the ultrasound confirmed that, yes indeed, there was a girl on the way.   It took months for us to agree on a first name and then more time to agree on the spelling…Kayleigh.  When she first began to talk she called herself KK and here at home the nickname has stuck, but everyone else calls her Kayleigh…until now. Now she is Brynn.

With the new year came new classes with new teachers and coaches and this has given her the perfect opportunity to tell them all her new name.  I did not realize this was her plan until after cheer practice when her coach told me KK asked her to call her Brynn from now on.  Later I overheard her telling her new swimming coach, “My name is Brynn.”  

When we came home last night I had voice mail from her 3rd grade teacher, “Kayleigh wants to be called Brynn…”. She wants to know if it is alright with us. 

This morning I received a call from the gym where she takes gymnastics, they wanted to know if I had two daughters in the class. KK had told her new coach her name is Brynn instead of saying, “I am Kayleigh, but please call me Brynn”. So the coach added her name to the roster. I told the gym to just have her full name on the roster so there would be no more confusion.

She has scouts tonight and I know that some of her friends there have already begun to call her Brynn.  The leaders haven’t said anything to me but this is their first official meeting of the year so I am bracing myself.

Honestly, I don’t know what to think.  I use a nickname, Hubby uses a nickname, all the kids have nicknames…don’t most people shorten their name or have another name that “sticks”?  Its not like she is picking a name from her favorite TV show or movie.  KK knows other people that use a different name other than their legal first name and she has presented a good argument for her case.  I don’t know if there is more to her name change other than she really likes one over the other, she denies there are any other motives.  While I am concerned about her “declaration” of her new name and that she changed it without a formal approval from Mom and Dad, I also wonder, can an 8 year old have an identity crisis?  Is she trying to hurt her dad or get approval from me?  Is there something deeper to this or am I just trying to read too much into it?  

Once again, my daughter has managed to baffle me.



  1. I went through a spell like that when I was a kid. Cynthia sounded pretensious, Cindy sounded like a 5 year old with pigtails. Diane was much more grown up though. My parents squashed all that and I went on being known as Cindy. Now, I’m just known as Mama, David’s Mom or Molly’s Mom, so there’s nothing left to bother me. 😉

    Comment by snigsspot — January 11, 2008 @ 8:06 am

  2. I think you are trying to psychoanalyze it too much. I suspect if you don’t give it too much attention and let it be, it will either revert back or just not be an issue. I don’t think I’d be overly bothered if my bug suddenly wanted to go by her middle name, mostly because it is also her name and she can feel free to claim it. Now if she suddenly wanted everyone to call her Amanda or something completely off the cuff and not related to her in any way, I would have to veto that.

    Comment by shellssells — January 16, 2008 @ 10:18 am

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